Blindsided by breaks
It seems every so often I find myself facing the reality that I have completely abandoned writing though I know how much it means to me. I had no idea that nearly six months had passed since I last wrote. Of course, there are a few reasons for my absence.
- I’ve been doing some freelance writing for the last several months, starting late last year. So technically I have been writing, just not for myself. It is, obviously, not even close to the same. But on a practical level, it meant I did have a constant stream of deadlines because I actually have a regular writing gig, not a bunch of one-offs. Clearing the head space to get down to some personal writing just never seemed to happen (until now when I realized I have no deadlines for the next week).
- I’ve been trying to do a bit more external focus rather than internal. My writing on this blog has, over the years, been very personal, which is a great outlet. But given that I am crawling my way out of a couple years of depression, some non-me focus seemed appropriate for a while.
- My mind has been taken up with trying to figure out what’s next for me over the short term in terms of employment or income generation, as well as longer term. I have floated along for several years with no real direction and it is time I get that straightened out. So I have been doing some research and investigation into various options (e.g. further studies, working abroad etc.)
Earlier today, I did browse through some old posts on here and remembered how much of myself I used to pour into this blog. There is so much of me still here. And yet, there is so much of me that has never made it into writing.
I’m not making any grand pronouncements of my return to regularity, but I am feeling inspired right now. I have some thoughts of where I want to take this blog so we’ll see.
About the Author
Bianca is a multi-slash lover of life. techie | wordsmith | photographer | performer | poet